Written by: Kat Collins, Counseling Associate
Have you ever found yourself incredibly irritated with your partner–deep in a serious internal debate about whether you should stay together–only to suddenly get your period and realize that you actually like them quite a bit?
If so, you’re not imagining it. Hormonal shifts can have a huge impact on mood, cravings, and relationships. The good news? There are strategies that can help. As a Counseling Associate, here are the five approaches I most often recommend to clients navigating PMS, PMDD, or perimenopause symptoms.
Embrace Your Food Cravings
While the benefits of eating more fruits and veggies are undeniable, cravings for so-called “unhealthy” foods can be your body’s way of asking for what it needs. If you’re suddenly desperate for pizza, chocolate, or cookies, it’s usually better to honor those cravings mindfully than to resist them–since forcing yourself to “power through” can backfire, leading to bingeing or irritability later.
Research shows that many PMS and PMDD symptoms reduce as serotonin levels rise. What helps boost serotonin quickly? Carbs, salt, and sweets. So the next time cravings hit, trust your body’s wisdom. Honor what it needs without letting diet culture guilt get in the way.
Track Your Symptoms
Anticipating when cravings, mood swings, or fatigue will arrive can make them feel more manageable. You can keep a simple print-out on the fridge or try one of many apps–such as Flo, Clue, or Me v PMDD.
Even if your cycle seems irregular, some type of rhythm usually emerges over time. Knowing what’s likely ahead helps you to prepare emotionally and mentally–and helps those close to you prepare too.
Honor Your Personal Boundaries
Preparation sometimes means protecting your energy. That’s where boundaries come in. And yes, they can feel uncomfortable at first. If you tend to people-please, you might have a desire to “do it all” to avoid letting anyone down. But the cost is usually your own well-being. After all, feelings of overwhelm and resentment don’t just disappear–they often return, stronger than before.
Start noticing what your limits feel like in your body. When you feel an instant surge of irritation when you take on something extra, that’s a signal a boundary is needed. A counselor can support you in identifying your needs and practicing assertive communication so you can express them clearly and respectfully.
Increase Your Self-Compassion
It’s common for people to push through distressing symptoms or to blame themselves for not exercising enough or eating too much sugar. But symptoms tied to PMS, PMDD, or perimenopause are complex. While lifestyle changes can help, they’re not the root cause–and certainly not your fault.
Instead of meeting yourself with criticism, try responding with kindness. When your emotions or thoughts flare up, remind yourself: I’m doing the best I can. These symptoms aren’t my fault. Offering yourself the same compassion you would give to a loved one can make a huge difference.
Attend Individual, Group, or Couples Counseling
While counseling won’t erase your hormonal symptoms, it can change the way you relate to them. Group counseling offers validation that you’re not alone and that what you’re experiencing is real. Couples counseling offers a supportive space to talk through your wants and needs with your partner. Individual counseling gives you tools for navigating the distress that can arise during different phases of your cycle.
Remember: these symptoms are not your fault. You did nothing to cause them, and you deserve support in navigating and minimizing them. Please extend to yourself the same compassion you’d give to someone you care about.
You don’t have to go through this alone. If you’d like support, we’d love to help. Reach out through our online portal, contact our intake team at intake@counselingworks.com, or call 630-281-2496.
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