Written by: Jareen Harris, MA, LPC
What if the exhaustion you feel in your mothering experience isn’t simply connected to motherhood? What if your exhaustion, anxiety, and stress has deeper roots connected to past trauma and the way it remains actively embedded in your nervous system?
Mothers can often carry mom-guilt due to the reality of the stress they feel when juggling all that comes with raising children. A trauma-informed examination of your stress response takes into consideration past circumstances which impacted you and your body in a significant way.
The Trauma Body
When we experience traumatic events – events that compromise our sense of safety and overwhelm our ability to effectively cope – it doesn’t only impact our thoughts. Trauma impacts our physiology and the way in which our body operates (Center for Substance Abuse Treatment US, 2014).
We exist within the window of our intricately designed nervous systems. Our nervous system is always ready to respond to our environment without us asking it to. This is the nature of our autonomic nervous system. Whether it be to fight/flee, freeze, fawn, or to shut down in response to a threat, our bodies choose what it feels is most conducive to survival at that time.
The trauma happens when we are not able to flexibly transition from a survival state back into a regulated state. In such instances, a person can spend prolonged time in hyper-vigilant and dysregulated states even when there is no immediate or true threat. This is trauma.
This can linger and show up in the body as:
- Muscle tension
- Bracing
- Tight core muscles and tight pelvic floor
- Jawline tension
- Hypervigilance and inability to feel relaxed
- Tight hip muscles
- Rounded and stiff shoulders
- Feelings of burnout & fatigue
- Racing heart beat
- Shallow breathing/chest breathing
How Trauma Shows up in Motherhood
Now, considering how this “trapped” trauma physiology remains dormant in the body and activates during times of stress or threat, it makes sense that motherhood could be an especially stressful experience for some.
What is required to care for young children can indeed present as a threat to a mother’s nervous system, particularly when there are unresolved trauma responses being triggered each time a mother feels overwhelmed.
The physical residuals of trauma manifest into emotions and behavior which can show up in parenting as:
- Heightened emotional reactivity
- Startled response/feeling “jumpy”
- “Perfectionism” or needing things to be a certain way
- Increased procrastination
- Feeling on edge
- Decreased patience
- Increased yelling
- Anger & irritation
- Difficulty with be present
- Feelings of despair
- Chronic stress
- The “mom guilt” cycle
Needless to say and despite our genuine love for our children, trauma physiology can indeed make mothering feel like a completely overwhelming experience.
There’s Hope
The truth of the matter is it doesn’t have to remain this way. Our bodies are resilient and professional support can be highly beneficial in treating trauma.
We are in a time where trauma-informed therapy and interventions are more widespread and accessible now more than ever before. There are many practitioners, books, and other resources to support mothers and individuals in addressing unresolved trauma physiology.
Somatic Therapy
Somatic Therapy specifically is becoming one of several go-to healing modalities utilized to work with the physiology of trauma.
In a Harvard Health article Somatic Therapy is described as “a treatment focusing on the body and how emotions appear within the body” (Salamon, 2023). The article further states: “Somatic therapies posit that our body holds and expresses experiences and emotions and traumatic events or unresolved emotional issues can become ‘trapped’ inside” (Salamon 2023).
Thus, working directly with the body in therapy can be highly beneficial.
Somatic interventions vary from clinician to clinician; however, some common somatic interventions include:
- Breathwork and breath awareness
- Relaxation exercises
- Mindful movement (stretching, somatic yoga, dance, fluid movement, intuitive movement)
- Trauma-informed self-touch
- Vagus nerve exercises
- Mindfulness practices to improve mind-body awareness
One study (Kim, Lee, Cho, & Park 2025), consisting of unmarried mothers with young children ages 0-5 years, showed significant improvements in the mother’s well-being when somatic practices were routinely applied. The study specifically revealed a decrease in anxiety and depression, improved self-esteem, improved posture, improved emotional regulation, and an enhanced ability to regulate emotions via breath and bodily movement (Kim et al., 2025).
This is Promising!
Through somatic interventions and Somatic Therapy, mothers can learn to work with their own stress physiology and develop the tools to feel calmer and more resilient. This newly developed and deeper connection to yourself can lead to healthier and more grounded relationships with your children and others.
Taking a step to nurture your body’s stress response, shows deep courage as you work to build a more harmonious future. Above all, the most important thing to remember is to be compassionate and patient with yourself each step of the way.
References
Center for Substance Abuse Treatment (US). Trauma-Informed Care in Behavioral Health Services. Rockville (MD): Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (US); 2014. (Treatment Improvement Protocol (TIP) Series, No. 57.) Chapter 3, Understanding the Impact of Trauma. Available from: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK207191/
Kim, S. J., Lee, J. H., Cho, H. Y., & Park, I. (2025). Effects of the Mindful Somatic Psychoeducation Program on the Mental Health of Unmarried Mothers: A Randomized Control Trial. Psychiatry investigation, 22(8), 897–905. https://doi.org/10.30773/pi.2025.0056
Salamon, M. (2023). What is somatic therapy? In Harvard Health. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/what-is-somatic-therapy-202307072951
About the Author:
Jareen Harris, MA, LCPC, brings over 14 years of experience helping working moms navigate the mind-body toll of balancing career and motherhood, including the physical stress patterns—jaw tension, neck and back pain, chronic fatigue—that often accompany burnout. As a mother and yoga teacher herself, she blends trauma-informed care with somatic interventions to help working moms address stress held in the nervous system, not just the mind. Her approach combines professional expertise with lived experience, helping women move from “pushing through” to genuinely reconnecting with their bodies and themselves.
