Is It Still a Hard Time to Be a Man?
Yes, and more people are beginning to recognize that. Since the release of Richard Reeves’ Of Boys and Men in 2022, conversations around the mental health challenges men face have continued to grow. Many men today report feeling lost, isolated, and unsure of their place in society. This isn’t just theoretical, men are over three times more likely than women to die from what researchers call “deaths of despair,” including suicide, alcohol-related illness, and opioid overdose.
What’s Changed for Men in Recent Generations?
Quite a bit. In the past, many men found identity through consistent roles in work, family life, and religious or community institutions. These structures offered clear purpose and a sense of belonging. But over time, those foundations have shifted. Some have become less accessible, while others no longer carry the same influence. As those roles have eroded, many men are left navigating expectations that no longer align with the world they’re living in.
Isn’t Having More Freedom a Good Thing?
In theory, yes. The freedom to define yourself outside of rigid gender roles can be incredibly liberating. But it can also be deeply disorienting. Without clear, modern models of masculinity, many men are left to figure it out on their own—often in isolation. And that isolation comes with real emotional costs.
Are These Changes Really Impacting Men’s Mental Health?
Absolutely. Societal shifts like rising living costs, changing job markets, and an education system that may not reflect how boys learn are leaving many men feeling left behind. While we can’t change these large-scale issues overnight, we can focus on what is within reach—building strong, meaningful connections.
So What Can Men Do About It?
Start small. In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General named loneliness one of our most pressing public health challenges. Men often carry this quietly, since vulnerability isn’t something many are taught to embrace. But it’s exactly what’s needed.
Try reaching out to someone you trust. Ask a friend to grab coffee, take a walk, or simply check in. It may feel uncomfortable, but it’s a crucial step toward rebuilding the social support men need not just to survive, but to thrive.
What’s the Takeaway?
While some external pressures may feel immovable, the antidote to despair often begins with connection. By strengthening friendships, showing up for one another, and embracing vulnerability, we can begin to redefine what it means to be a man in today’s world—together.
References:
Reeves, R. V. (2022). Of boys and men: Why the modern male is struggling, why it matters, and what to do about it. Brookings Institution Press.
Edin, K., Nelson, T., Cherlin, A., & Francis, R. (2019). The Tenuous Attachments of Working-Class Men. The Journal of Economic Perspectives, 33(2), 211–228. https://www.jstor.org/stable/26621246
Beseran E, Pericàs JM, Cash-Gibson L, Ventura-Cots M, Porter KMP, Benach J. Deaths of Despair: A Scoping Review on the Social Determinants of Drug Overdose, Alcohol-Related Liver Disease and Suicide. Int J Environ Res Public Health. 2022 Sep 29;19(19):12395. doi: 10.3390/ijerph191912395. PMID: 36231697; PMCID: PMC9566538.
Office of the Assistant Secretary for Health (OASH). (2023, May 3). New Surgeon General Advisory raises alarm about the devastating impact of the epidemic of loneliness and isolation in the United States. HHS.gov. https://www.hhs.gov/about/news/2023/05/03/new-surgeon-general-advisory-raises-alarm-about-devastating-impact-epidemic-loneliness-isolation-united-states.html
